So, on the day that I signed the Motion for Contempt (because he didn’t obey the judge and he won’t pay to support his children),
a co-worker acted like The Boss and corrected me 4 times, snarkily (I think that should be a word).
And on that same day The Love yelled at me (yes, yelled, which he never, ever does) because he momentarily confused me with A Ghost From His Past.
It wasn’t my fault. “I didn’t cause it, I can’t control it, and I can’t cure it” suddenly applied to something I didn’t see coming.
And in a breath it was over and done with,
But I was stunned (without breath) and so it wouldn’t pass on
and lingered instead, sludge-like in my throat and belly, all day.
I tried to detach. I really did. But these are new muscles that don’t always work right and instead, I got kind of sick.
But I still worked and smiled and tried to Be Happy which made me feel a little like I am growing.
And then when I picked up my baby from camp (the one who is only 5),
they said he told his teacher, “Mother Fucker”.
It was good it was 5:30 and Time To Go Home.
It was even better that now I have a Home to go to.
So I went there and cried. And drank champagne for dinner. I watched movies with my kids in pajama’s before the sun was even down.
In the morning It Was Okay. It really was. Which sort of seems like a miracle.
To me. Does it to you?